My Conversation With Jesus

Hey riders, it’s Guido the dumb biker dude. Say, I have a question for all you bikers out there. Have you ever talked to Jesus? You know, just talked with him? Have you ever wondered what your talk with Jesus would sound like?

I have. My talk with Jesus would probably start like this…………………………

One day I was polishing the Harley in the garage when this dude comes up to me and says: “nice bike”. I said to him: “thanks” and I went back to cleaning and polishing. Well, it didn’t take long for me to realize that someone was standing over my shoulder “watching” me, so I turned and this dude was standing there, yea the same one that said “nice bike” almost five minutes ago. I was kinda irritated cause I had a lot more cleaning and polishing to do before my ride on Saturday. So I said kind of sarcastically: “Dude, Can I help you?” At this point, he just looked at me and said: “Actually, I was hoping I could help “YOU.”

Now keep in mind that I had not paid much attention to the dude before, but now he had my attention. I stopped what I was doing and took a good look at the guy for the first time. He was tall with long hair. He had on an old looking long sleeve flannel shirt, old Levi’s with holes in the knees and flip flops on his feet. I thought to myself, man this guy’s wacked. He must be looking for a hand out. Strange thing about him though; he had these narly scars on both his hands and feet. I must have been staring, because there was this uncomfortable silence that passed between us that seemed to go on for an eternity. Not wanting to further embarrass myself, I said to him: “Wow dude, you must have had a nasty accident or something.” He kinda chuckled and said: “Yea, you might say that.”

Well, at this point I felt that the dude was pretty harmless, so I decided to introduce myself. I stood up, offered my hand and said: “I’m Guido, the dumb biker dude.” He took my hand and said: “Hi Guido, my name is Jesus.” At this point I didn’t even hear his name, because he still had a grip on my hand. There was something strangely familiar about his grasp, but I couldn’t place it. It was warm and inviting, yet scary at the same time. I felt that his eyes were looking right through me. At this point, I realized who I was talking to. Talk about egg on my face! I was so embarrassed! I wanted to run, faint, and hide all at the same time, but his gaze and grip on my hand, kept me in quiet awestruck silence.

I was shaking so bad at this point that I thought I would break into little pieces. I heard myself stammering out the words: “Oh Jesus, I am so sorry, I did not recognize you!

I thought he was going to send me to hell right then and there, but he laughed and said: “Ya know Guido, you wouldn’t believe how often I get told that.” I said: “really?” He said: “You bet. 2000 + years ago, when I came down here for the first time, they didn’t recognize me either. In fact, those dudes crucified me. Remember Guido?” I said: “Yes Lord, I remember. You died on the cross so that all men could have eternal life. At this point, I became consciously aware of my own sinful life and felt like I shouldn’t have rated a visit from my Lord and Savior.” He just smiled at me, sighed and said: “Yeah, well that was in the past. It is finished. I came down hear to talk to you.”

Back to me again. I thought I could change the subject for awhile, but now it was back to me! Good grief, I thought at any moment I was going to be smashed into a thousand atoms and take a dirt nap!

He must have known my thoughts and felt my anxiety, cause he just looked at me and said: “So Guido, what is the question you wanted to ask me? I looked him right in the eye and said: What question? To which he replied: Seriously Guido, your not gonna pull that one on me, are you? I just said: “ Sorry Lord, I couldn’t help myself, ya know that sin nature and all. I forgot that you knew me before I was even born.”

Anyway, there was no escaping it so I asked him: “How come you don’t listen to me when I pray? He said: I listen to you all the time. How come you don’t listen to me? I just looked at him and said: Man, whatta talkin about? He just shook his head and said: Guido, you dumb biker dude. Don’t you know that you could have had it made a long time ago, but you just wouldn’t listen to me. I gave you hints. I sent people into your life to influence you, but no, you had to live for yourself. You became part of a fallen and sinful world. Well, I was broken at this point, but before I could get a word in he just looked at me and said: How’s that workin for ya?” I was speechless at this point. I just hung my head in shame. He grabbed me and hugged me tight. I never wanted him to let me go.

Jesus looked at me with great love and affection and said: “Look Guido, let’s talk about the reason for my visit. Your what? 54 years old, goin on 55? I think I can finally do something with you. I said: Me? I’m a mess. What can you do with someone like me? He just laughed and said: Guido, I love people that are a mess, in fact, truth be told, all you human beings are a mess, that’s why I had to die on the cross! Well, no argument from me I said. But what can I do for you? He just simply said: Finish the race, trust in my plan for your life and listen to my words!”

I said: “Lord, I think I can do that. But why are you coming to me now? He said: Because I am coming back soon and there is much work to be done. The harvest is great, but the worker’s are few. I want you to be a light to others Guido. I will do the rest. Hold on fast to what you have until I return, then we will be together for all eternity.”

Jesus then looked at me and said: “Guido, I have to go. There are millions of other people I have to visit before the day is over. Do you have any other questions before I go? Not wanting to take up any more of his time, I just simply asked: Jesus, me and my brothers have been having this discussion for a long time, so I thought I would ask you this one question. Is it true that you ride a Harley Davidson? He just smiled at me as he turned and said: Guido, I love you, even if you are a dumb biker dude.” As fast as he came he was gone. I was left there with my thoughts and a feeling of absolute peace and love. Ya know, I never did get finished polishing my Harley. I guess Jesus had other plans for me.